Question: I hate to say it, but my husband is worthless. After we separated when I was three months pregnant, he borrowed money and went to technical school rather than going to work. I worked until a week before my child was born and was back at work in a month. That was two years ago, during which time he only paid me $250 each month.

Then he graduated and started working, and did not increase the child support. So I went to court and appeared before a judge to get more. But even though the child support guidelines call for $675 per month child support, the judge increased child support to only $465 because my ex had borrowed money to get educated and the judge wanted him to be able to pay back his loans. I am irate that he can continue to get away with this. Do I need a lawyer? My ex had one at the hearing but I did not.

Answer: While you should probably have hired an attorney to represent your – and your child’s – interests, we assume that the judge decided your case on the basis that, in the long run, the cost of your husband improving his capacity to earn was reasonable. Therefore, the judge used his (or her) discretion to vary from the child support guidelines – something the court can do so long as sufficient factual findings are made – so that your ex could pay off his loans.

In other words, because your former husband’s education is expected to increase his earning capacity in the long run, which will be to your child’s benefit, the judge cut him some slack now to allow him to pay off the loans. On the other hand, had your ex incurred debt that didn’t result in him bettering himself and didn’t allow him to better his earning capacity, there probably would have been a different result. Apparently, your ex convinced the judge what he had done was reasonable. Short of an appeal, you may be out of luck – at least for now. But child support is always subject to modification based on substantial changes of circumstance.

Question: My estranged wife has received gifts of furniture, jewelry, cash, and stocks since we were married 12 years ago. But now that we are separated, her parents have stopped making gifts that amounted to $25,000 each year.

My wife does not work outside the home. Will the gifts that her parents gave her count so as to reduce my support obligation to her and our children?

Answer: The answer to your question depends on the wording of the child support statute in your state. Generally, gifts from parents are excluded from the definition of “gross income” in your child support state law because 1) your wife has no legal right to force her parents to do anything for her, and 2) her parents have no legal obligation to her or your children.

That said, however, the receipt of gifts may still be important when support is computed because, generally speaking and depending on where you live, the court may well have the authority and flexibility to consider gifts as “special circumstances” in computing support. There is, however, no hard and fast rule, which, depending on the circumstances, may be good.