Question: I am e-mailing you and asking for an immediate response because I am in deep trouble. I have paid my lawyer $15,000 (all borrowed from my elderly parents) over the past 18 months. A trial date was set months ago but now, two weeks before the trial, my lawyer (who I heard from only infrequently before) told me that I should settle for less than what I turned down a year ago on his advice. I am especially upset because I have spent nearly $8,000 in additional fees since then, and he claims I owe him more.

He says if I don't settle, I may get less because a judge said in a pretrial conference six months ago that he had made up his mind about my case, and this is the same judge who will hear the case. I believe my lawyer is trying to squeeze me into a settlement to avoid two days in court. I am out of money and time.

Answer: Although experienced family judges may be able to review a file and come up with a pretty good evaluation of a case relatively quickly, we find it quite unusual (and, if it happened, most inappropriate) for a judge to state opinions about a case before the evidence is heard. Seasoned matrimonial lawyers know that most divorce cases are settled, the vast majority of them shortly before trial.

While we don’t know all of the facts, we believe something funny may be going on here. When the initial offer was made, your lawyer should have evaluated the case and advised you, in writing, of the benefits and drawbacks of the proposal so you could make the final decision to accept or reject. He should have explained to you the time value of money: getting one dollar today may be better than spending money and time to wind up with 70 cents two years later.

Bottom Line: You were entitled to an evaluation long before the eleventh hour. Having received none, you now have three basic choices: 1) Agree to settle and cut your losses. 2) Demand that your case be tried and take your chances. 3) Or, although quite unusual, go to court -- with your lawyer and your spouse present -- and state your concerns to the judge, including what your lawyer said the judge said, and see what happens. Although none of these choices may be to your liking, it’s a little late in the game to expand your options.

SoloFact: Many of our readers have disabled children and write about squabbles over support and the cost of education and services. We suggest that before parents fight, they should use their energies to research the wide array of services available.

For example, children aged three or older are generally entitled to Early Intervention Services from local school districts free of charge. Disabled children over age three are entitled to preschool special education services from their local school districts again, free of charge.

Under state and federal law, all handicapped children between five and 21 are entitled to a free special public education. And no child can be rejected, regardless of the severity of the handicap.

States also provide vocational programs, independent living centers, and other rehabilitation services. So check these and other programs out and make sure you and your lawyers know all of the options before you make a final settlement.