Based on questions from our readers, this is the third and concluding column dealing with common taxation mistakes that you should avoid when you divorce. The others can be found by going to www.flyingsolo.com.

NEVER SETTLE YOUR CASE WITHOUT OBTAINING TAX ADVICE IF THERE ARE POTENTIAL TAX CONSEQUENCES: If you have read the two prior installments, you should understand why it is so important to engage a tax expert when you have business or complicated property or support questions to resolve, especially when there is a rearrangement of ownership of a closely held business.

These experts may include any -- or sometimes all -- of the following: CPA’s, CVA’s (Certified Valuation Analysts), and tax lawyers. Because there are comparatively few matrimonial lawyers who are also tax attorneys, tax lawyers may be needed to interface with certified public accountants for creative tax planning. And you shouldn’t forget estate planning and pension issues which can be complicated.

SoloFact: No one needs to remind us that the failure rate of first marriages in the United States is 50 percent. Or that second marriages are exercises in futility 60 percent of the time. Or, if you Google “101 Things”, you will find 8,440,000 results.

And while divorce self-help books are literally a dime a dozen (just Google “divorce”), after reviewing “101 Things I Learned After My Divorce”, we believe it may be worth the read for those interested in a different approach to dealing with divorce problems.

Written by Tomi Tuel who calls herself a “Divorce Warrior”, this is a “from the heart” yet humorous field guide to divorce recovery. In a touching, yet light-hearted journey, Ms. Tuel explores the universal truths about the emotional process of divorce and leads readers through the various roadblocks on the road to renewal.

In “101 Things”, Tuel shares her insights and real-world experience to help readers come to grips with reality while sampling humorous diversions from the emotional chaos of shattered relationships.

Because seeing the warning signs of divorce isn't enough for most who go through it, they need methods by which to either repair broken relationships or to move on. Tuel first helps readers understand how they may have contributed to their own relationship problems and then offers tools (from the 'Tuelbox' at the end of each chapter) to help readers avoid, self-diagnose, and even heal some of the problems. Believing that "There are no completely innocent spouses", Tues takes a bold approach to problem solving. What we liked most is that Tuel is not afraid to tell readers what many divorce counselors don't on such topics as moving on from despair to indifference, achieving the ideal divorce (if there is such a thing), and even dating after the relationship has crashed and burned.


We found “101 Things” to be resource that may well help those in pain to fine perspective and realize there is life after divorce. As she recounts in “101 Things,”, Tuel found peace after her divorce and now is a frequent speaker to audiences on divorce recovery. She has remarried and lives with her husband and two children in Sacramento, California. We recommend “101 Things I Learned After My Divorce” as a resource for those facing divorce or even interested bystanders who may want to better understand the tribulations of a Divorce Warrior.

For book information or to reach the author, visit www.tomituel.com or go to www.amazon.com.