Question: When I went to see my lawyer for the first time, he insisted that I fill out what he referred to as an "income and asset disclosure form." Throughout our 20-year marriage - during which time I stayed at home, I was given an "allowance" with which to purchase groceries and miscellaneous household items. I have no information about how much it costs to run the house or what my husband earns. My lawyer didn't tell me how to get this information. Do you have any tips?

Answer: At a time of upheaval in your life, it is sometimes difficult -- but absolutely necessary -- to focus on preparing for your financial future. In all 50 states, you will be required to file financial affidavits under oath so the court will know what you need and what you have. In most instances, supporting documents are necessary.

You have access to more information than you may think: 1) You are entitled to copies of all tax returns you signed either from your accountant, the IRS, or your state tax commission; 2) If you co-signed mortgages or loans, you are entitled to financial statements and loan records at banks and savings and loans; 3) If you are the owner or co-owner of bank accounts, securities, real estate, or insurance policies, you are entitled to information about them; 4) You should have your banking records and receipts which give a history of your household expenditures; 5) Real estate records, including taxes, are public records; and 6) Your utility company has records of -- or can estimate -- your electricity bills. These are just a few ideas to help you get started.

Question: My first husband and I were divorced after 15 years. He is 65 now and draws Social Security. My second husband and I called it quits after 12 years. My second husband is 63 and is not drawing Social Security benefits. Both of my former husbands have remarried, and both have divorced again. I am almost 62, have not remarried, have worked very little, and have not built up much of a Social Security fund. A friend told me that I can get half of either of my ex-husbands' Social Security. How does this work?

Answer: The simple answer to your questions boils down to a choice of which Social Security benefit is the greatest: Yours, your first husband's, or your second husband's. Beginning when you reach age 62, you may be eligible to draw a benefit as the divorced spouse of a living worker who is either 1) drawing retirement or disability benefits as is your first husband or 2) eligible for, but not drawing, retirement benefits like your second husband.

Your first husband is already drawing. Therefore, so long as your marriage lasted a ten full years before the divorce and so long as you are not married when you make your application, you may be eligible based on his Social Security benefit.

Your second husband is eligible for, but not drawing. In this instance, so long as the marriage lasted ten full years before the divorce, so long as you are not married when you apply, and so long as the divorce took place at least two years before your application, you may be eligible based on his Social Security benefit.

In either situation, you will qualify for a spouse's benefit only if your own retirement benefit is less than your benefit as a spouse would be. If you later remarry, your benefit will generally terminate.

Since you were married to each of two men for more than ten years, you (and for that matter, all wives of either of them who have ten years under their belts) could conceivably draw benefits from the same man without reducing his share.

If you begin to draw at age 62, which is before your normal retirement age, you will not receive half of the benefit you choose. Your local Social Security office can explain to you how the amount of your benefit will be determined.

As a further resource, you may wish to review the Social Security section that is located at http://www.flyingsolo.com.

Q: My husband and I were divorced last year. Although I knew better (but couldn't prove it), he pleaded poverty, closed his business, and even went into bankruptcy to keep me from getting anything. I ran out of money and agreed to his terms to "get it over." Now, he has remarried and everything we had -- but which he claimed he didn't have -- has magically reappeared. Do I have any recourse?

A: Fraudulent concealment or transfer of assets is not uncommon in divorce cases. Depending on where you live, you may want to look into trying to reopen the divorce judgment if you can prove there was fraud involved. There are time limitations on some remedies, so contact a lawyer as soon as you can. Similarly, if there was fraud perpetrated on the bankruptcy court, we assume that the bankruptcy trustee who handled the case would be interested in what you've found.

Jan Collins Stucker is an award-winning writer and editor. Jan Warner is a matrimonial, elder, and tax attorney. Both are based in Columbia, South Carolina. Flying Solo is distributed nationally by Knight Ridder Tribune News Service.

Please send your questions to P.O.Box 11704, Columbia, S.C. 29211 or email to janwarner@flyingsolo.com. Be sure to visit Flying Solo on the Internet.